Dad ate the Minwax

The two cans of furniture refinisher sat in the Home Depot bag next to me on the floor of the ER examination room while we waited for the results of a precautionary chest x-ray. An array of lights flashed Dad’s vital signs in neon colors. Dad was vital alright, he was doing pull-ups using the gurney rails and babbling happily to the doctor. Now and then Dad pointed out some medically interesting tidbit like his missing kneecap, his hearing aid and the corn on his little toe. He covered one eye at a time to demonstrate – unrequested – his ability to read the writing on both a child abuse prevention poster and the doctor’s name-tag. Each medical offering drew a smile and nod from the doctor towards Dad and his questioning look towards me. “Dementia”, I said. “Ah”, said the doctor. The triage nurse returned with the results of the call to Poison Control. The Minwax that Dad had scraped out of the can to eat with a spoon would not harm him after all. It would just induce a mild laxative effect. The dark walnut refinishing liquid was a little more toxic, however not much of that was missing from its can. The chest x-ray results came back negative except for a small “spot” in his lower lung lobe that could be unrelated early onset of pneumonia. The doctor wrote a prescription for ammoxicillian but suggested I fill it only if Dad developed a cough. I helped Dad back into his jacket, handed him his cane and thanked the staff. Dad waved happily to everyone as we shuffled our way out into the lobby and back to the car.

On the drive home I began questioning my actions. Should I have called the Poison Control number rather than rush Dad to the ER? Perhaps. Had I reacted like a mother with an injured two-year-old? Yes. But Dad ate Minwax for crying out loud! He drank furniture refinisher after prying off a childproof cap and forcing a tight red safety plug out of the can! The stuff had awful fumes that made me light headed but he drank it! I mentally retraced the event. The cans had been sitting on the kitchen island where I had dropped them while I answered a phone call. I didn’t notice the bag was missing. It wasn’t until I was taking Dad his tuna casserole that the Minwax fumes in his room sent me into a panic. He was putting the lid back on the can saying “I don’t think I can eat any more of that”. I searched frantically for the can of refinisher liquid and discovered it out on the back porch. I read the accidental ingestion warning on each can. “Call the doctor immediately” and Contact Poison Control at once”. Yikes! I knew what Dad’s doctor would say if I ever even got past the receptionist: “take him to the ER!” Calling the 800 number for Poison Control and being put on hold? No. Ok, so I wouldn’t have done anything differently. But next time (next time?) I’ll think it through and act with more forethought, rationally. I felt better. I relaxed, absolved.

Later, at home, I searched for the missing childproof cap and red safety plug. Gone. Maybe he swallowed them? Oh well, they’re probably not toxic and the laxative effect of the Minwax…well… he should pass them.